It's time...

Thank you to Elwood Bryant and Chris Miller for their donations.

The time has finally come...I leave tomorrow!

I have 2 HUGE suitcases full of donations. I am really hoping they don't weigh over the limit. I have a carry on full of heather items, and a big "purse" of cameras, reading materials and snacks. Oh and of course my long flight socks to pull on when the plane overnight lights turn off.

Today went really fast. Now that I have crawled into bed and thought about it - the day is sort of a blur.

I am feeling calm and prepared. I can't think of anything I may have forgotten. I don't have any last minute cravings for food I won't be able to eat while I am gone. No nerves. I haven't felt any nervousness regarding this trip. It feels so right to me I can't think of anything to be nervous about. I am looking forward to learning, to the entire experience, and all of the unknown to see and touch and smell...well maybe not the smells. But really, nothing can smell as bad as Ano Nuevo Island - dead fish, seals, birds and the live gassy seals all of it basking in the sea salt humid air...

I usually don't start to feel the butterfly giddy excitement until I am at the airport or just before take off. I have no doubt tomorrow I will not be this calm and relaxed.

I am feeling a bit guilty for leaving the dogs for such a long time, so I am easing that by letting them both sleep on the bed tonight. Hobee is already running in his REM sleep. Oh and Hobee loved Stephanie, so I am feeling a lot better about the dog sitting situation. They will both be just fine :)



Quite a few of you have asked me Why Rwanda...I still haven't been able to organize my reasons enough to be able to blog about them. I have sat down quite a few times to try to express my feelings but I am not sure if I have writers block or if I just am not ready to put it all out there. This trip is so emotionally and spiritually important to me that maybe it is still too personal for me to share that part of it... I am looking forward to that point in the trip or maybe after the trip when I am able to grasp it and express myself.

What I can say is this is my biggest dream come true. I am feeling blessed and lucky to be able to be going to Rwanda at this stage of my life instead of having to wait until I retire. Everything in my life has led up to this...I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. And one thing that resonates in my mind so often is something my friend, Mike Jennings, once said to me...We were having a conversation about why I didn't have a child or children of my own. He explained to me that my need to volunteer and help and learn about kids in less fortunate situations has enabled me to have so many children in my life...true they aren't "my own" but had I had my own I may not have been able to have the time to be a Big Sister with BBBS or to volunteer with Read To Me or to go on this trip and take what I have learned and hopefully help kids in a truly deserving country. Instead because of what I have been unable to do has enabled me to have more children in my life than I could have ever dreamed of.

I can only hope and pray and dream that I make a difference in their lives as they have in mine.

The kids aren't the only reason for this journey...but they are all an important part of what has led me to today.

Mike and I had this conversation the day I told him about my decision to go to Rwanda. And his response was so meaningful to me that I think about it a lot and it makes it all the more real that I have made the right decisions and have no regrets.

I will only be gone a few short weeks but I have no doubt these short few weeks will change my life, my way of thinking, so many different things about life. I realize not everyone gets why I want and need to do this. I know not everyone agrees with my decision to go or for a lot of my life decisions for that matter...but for me nothing could be so right. I wish I was going longer, but I also know and seem to believe I will go back. This is sort of just a test trip for me :)

I hope each of you get something out of this blog. I hope each of you keep in touch.